Essay Draft Feedback

• in intro - why answering the question 
• don't need to reference the dictionary - just re word 
• Write more about brand personalities ... 
• combine the Guthrie 1993 quotes - ibid?? if just them two quotes
• the Kelloggs social media mention - need a contemporary or newer example etc and explain
• reference always after the quote not before 
• Say Crayola afterwards ....
• Bernardini - say suggested instead - sub culture is growing - evidence could support it 
• say who they are etc at beginning  - then reference 
• need more of my own writing 
• MIFFY
• more examples - history
• been around - globalisation - way things have changed ...
• history of brand mascots - how relevant they were  A CHAPTER 
• how it has changed - how it was - CASE STUDIES - 50/60'S
• Japanese adapted elements of western culture - like miffy
• how the Japanese use it in a different way - used everywhere in Japan
• saturated - street in Tokyo as a reference pic - talk about it
• their approach is different 
• make sure when I say saturated it isn't refering to water 
• semiotics is good